I’ve decided to give online dating a whirl. Seeing as my last two attempts at dating someone I met face to face resulted in failures, on no fault of my own aside from shitty luck, what’s the worst that could happen?
Looking back at my dating life, it’s been pretty dismal…And a majority of my friends agree that I seem to have I seem to have the worst luck when it comes down to dating. My luck is so bad that they’re already starting to come up with “fun ways” on how the guy from my first date will be flawed (one bet married and secretly dating)…There’s one friend who’s holding out that everything will be nice and fine and normal with no catch. In either case, if this whole online dating thing doesn’t work out, then I’ll be right back where I am right now in my life – not dating.
One of my friends and I agreed…If it all goes to shit and my horrible luck in dating strikes again on this adventure, I’ll have even MORE stories that we all can laugh about later.
I decided to dip my toes into online dating several months back by joining a free site. Several waffling choices of deactivating and reactivating my account, I finally decided to delete my profile for good.
Why?
1) I got at least two messages a day from no-picture-profile creeps asking about my feet/toes. Or even worse – asking for pictures of my feet/toes.
2) The constant “yooooooooooooooo guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurl!!! hit me uuuuuuuup!!!!!” …I can only assume they have a sticky keyboard and I do NOT want to know how, why, or from what….
3) The lack of basic grammar. I know I’m not perfect and people make mistakes…But for fuck’s sake, know the difference between “your” and “you’re” or stop typing on the internet. And spell check is helpful, I promise!
4) On my final days on the site, I saw a profile of a guy who was into classic music. So I asked him if he had any recommendations for upcoming symphonies – not even asking him to go with me. I get a message back a couple hours later with him FREAKING out, saying he just got out of a long term relationship and he thought he was ready to date, but he isn’t and he’s sorry to do this, but he’s deleting his account, but here’s a link to the show he’d recommend me seeing. …What…
Those are the reason why I upgraded to a paid site. I’m committed to it for at least six months. I figured that if I paid for it, I should at least attempt to stick it out. I’m four days in and not one person asked about my feet, much to my delight. Nothing against my feet, but I think that I have a much better personality and hold better conversations than they do.
I’ve also noticed a great increase in the ability to use English in the written form. I seriously shouldn’t be thrilled by this fact, but I am. I spend more time reading about a person on their profile…instead of clenching my jaw and mentally correcting every error before I rage quit and flip my laptop.
A trend I’ve noticed so far…does everyone who joins online dating sites have to be into hiking? I mean, seriously…Did I miss the memo for this requirement? Every profile I’ve looked at so far has had at least ONE hiking picture and it’s listed as an interest. If I don’t get any dates, can I blame it on not liking hiking due to my sun sensitivity and fear of heights?
I know to be careful with online dating…
I know not to financially help out people (scammers)…
I know not to let myself get murdered…
Yet, here I am…I’m going to try. And I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t a bit nervous about this whole thing…And putting myself out there.
Pixie Clay 